VR Missionary (Extended Version)

Yes, one of my first questions for you is why do you think that some people would rather spend more of their life in here, in virtual reality, than in real life? Yeah, I mean it's gonna be different for everybody, but ultimately I think for some people they might feel like this life is better than their real life. But whatever the reason is, I think it's hard to understand where a person is or why they do what they do. Unless you first understand where they came from and what they've been through, you've got to be willing to hear their story, right? Yeah, totally. For example, part of my story, in middle school my best friend was going to commit suicide. Oh man. And he was going to do it through a school shooting. Oh my gosh. He had a full plan in place, he had everything that he needed, he even was giving his stuff away to other friends. He even gave his Xbox away. And I ended up stopping him from doing that. But In doing that, I lost my best friend. And because I couldn't really talk about it with hardly anybody, I just became super isolated and lonely. So on this side of things, was losing his friendship worth it? Yeah, absolutely. Even though it, throughout most of my life, I struggled to make friends or trust that things like that wouldn't happen again. It's his life we're talking about. I wouldn't have been his friend if I wouldn't have done that. Yeah man, sometimes it can cost everything to love people. Yeah. When you were a kid, did you want to be the president of the United States or an astronaut? What were your dreams? Yeah, I wanted to be, from the age of four, a tuba player. Join a symphony. At four? At four years old. What happened at four? Yeah, I was at a concert and there was a guy playing the tuba and I pointed to it and I said, "I want to do that when I get older." So I don't want to stereotype tuba players, but did that impact your ability to make friends? It did not. That's good? No. Huh. [Laughter] Interesting. Okay. My mind went to like, you know, I don't have a section to play with. I'm playing alone. I'm being my own guy. So that was middle school. I don't know. I grew up in a Christian home with loving parents and an older brother and we went to church every Sunday, but I hated it. Didn't make sense to me. So before I talked about how in middle school I had lost my best friend. And so I would say it was at that moment where I first felt alone and fully isolated. And that didn't really end. I was that kid in high school that sat alone during lunch. I wasn't even at the lunch tables. I was outside of the lunch tables in the hallway sitting by myself. Most days I would go all day without even having anyone to talk to me. And as soon as I got home from school every day, I would play video games online because it would really help me forget about all that. Because you can be anyone you want to be, go anywhere you want to go. You can be a Jedi. You can jump on a broom and fly through Hogwarts. You can be a soldier. Whatever you want to be, you can be. And funny enough, even though I went to video games in the midst of being lonely, it's actually where I found some of my closest friends. And one of the boys introduced me to a girl through online gaming. We played all the time together every single day we would talk. And we even ended up meeting up in person to go on a date together. So that led to a very serious relationship. We ended up moving in together for six years. She really wanted to get married, but I knew that she wasn't the one. And the day that I realized that, I lost my best friend. What did that feel like? It brought me back to that moment after middle school where I lost my friends and I was alone. It brought me to feeling like I wasn't loved. And had no one, I didn't see that life was worth living for. That there was anything worthwhile in life at all. While most people go to drugs and alcohol in the midst of that time, I would go into this virtual space and there you can be your real self, the good and bad. And your brain gets to a point of where it just sinks together and everything on the inside feels just as real as everything on the outside. Funny enough, the people in the space are more real and more honest than most people that I've met in real life. And it can be a great place in many instances, but it could also be dark. And I went there and went dark. I would go in and I would pick up women. I would even make a game out of it. Over time I realized none of it was going to fill the void that I had in my heart. And you still felt alone? I did, yeah. Even though, I stayed up till like 5 a.m. and then went to work just a few hours later than that and did the same thing over and over again. I was still alone. It seems like most people that I've met are just that way. They have that void inside of them and they're going to all kinds of different places within this space to try and fill that void. And there's always a reason why someone would rather spend so much of their time in a digital world instead of the real world. So before I talked about how I grew up going to church and hated it. Then I had heard the gospel every Sunday, but I never really got it. I never could wrap my head around why is it so important that Jesus died on the cross. It didn't make sense to me. One day I was in the car and I had been asking God that question, which was weird because I may have been one of the first times I've ever prayed actually. And he answered me and it was like my entire body had goosebumps all over and I felt at peace. I felt loved, truly loved. And it was like he gave me that answer with words that I would never use in a way that I would never say it and just shoved it into my head. Now I would even go as far as saying that's the first time I didn't feel alone in my whole life. I just had this huge desire to learn more about God and to know God more. And I didn't want to go back to the church that I grew up at. And so I went to where I was most comfortable in VR and I found a church there. And I met up with the pastor there, Jason. And in that place that is real but not real, I really gave my life to Christ. And I felt peace that surpasses understanding. I felt joy. I felt truly loved. At that moment I knew God. And even though Jason was across the country, he discipled me in this place. We prayed together. We read the Bible together. And God over time continued to grow this fire in my heart to go back to the people, my people, and to tell them that I found the answer that they're looking for. And many people came to believing in Christ. And then I began to disciple them just as I was discipled. But because it was so costly, the suffering that was happening with the people, just the pain, it was overwhelming to me. It even got to the point of asking God to call me away from it. But God made it clear. He had brought me out to bring me back in. And one night God woke me up and told me to get on VRChat. So I got on and I asked where God? And the Holy Spirit led me to a specific world, one of tens of thousands. Then to a specific person, one of tens of thousands. God had been preparing his heart to hear the gospel, and he gave his life to Christ. I'm so honored to be used by God to help out other people just as I was helped when I needed God most. God is in this space. He is preparing people's hearts in this space. And he's asking me to give up everything I've known to follow him in this. I love you, baby. I love you too. Because where he calls me to is where I will be most effective. And as God would have it, I never expected an organization like Jesus Film with the same heart and the same vision to somehow find me. And to ask me to join their team to become one of the first VR missionaries to help continue to pioneer to reach the unreachable. My God given vision is to shine the light of Christ in a virtual world. To go to a place that many go to as a last resort before they give up. This is more than an opportunity. This is for some life or death and for all eternal life or death. Ultimately, I just want to be where the Lord sends me. For Jesus' name to be known. For Jesus to be known. And for my name to be forgotten.